Monday, July 16, 2007

Asshole Webmaster

The other day, I made a suggestion via an online suggestion box on Indy's city web page. I'd been searching for some info about utilities and other relocation stuff, and I didn't really find anything obviously related on the Indy page. I thought that seemed a little strange, so I submitted the following suggestion:

"A section geared toward people who are moving to the Indy area would be really helpful. You could include: - a list of utility companies w/contact info, phone company, TV services, etc. - information about different areas/neighborhoods of the city - etc."

Today, I got the following email response:

Such content is handled by the Indianapolis Convention and Visitor’s Bureau (a non-profit that is independent of the City) which is prominently linked to from our “Visiting” page. The direct URL to that site is:

Look under the Relocation section.


Steve Werner

Webmaster of Indianapolis
Information Services Agency (Northrop Grumman)
City of Indianapolis/Marion County
200 E. Washington Street, Suite 960
Indianapolis, Indiana 46204
(317) 327-7859

Yes, I see. The *Visitor's* Bureau page is "prominently" linked. Like I am an asshole. Like I am a stupid asshole. This is the description that accompanies that "prominent" link:

"Indianapolis Convention & Visitors Association: ICVA's site,, provides current and official visitor information including attractions, sightseeing, arts, hotels, restaurants, shopping, transportation and destination highlights."

Hmm, let's see, I didn't want information about attractions, sightseeing, arts, hotels, restaurants, shopping, transportation, or destination highlights.... Come to think of it, I didn't really want VISITOR information... I wanted RESIDENT information! Why the fuck would I go look at that website?!?!?!? It doesn't sound anything like what I want!

So, instead of writing back something like,

Dear Steve,

You are a fucking asshole. Why in the fuck would I look at a page that you've described as having information about hotels and shopping, when I want to know who to call to get my utilities turned on? Fuck you, you mothereffing douche.

Love, Jane

I wrote and thanked him for the redirect, explained why I did not think the "prominent" web site would be applicable (without using "prominent"), and requested that he amend my suggestion so that it read more like "I suggest you amend the description of the Visitor's Bureau site so that it notes that relocation information is included!"

Am I just overthinking it? Or does it seem really stupid to expect people to go search a page about temporarily visiting a city in order to find information about permanently relocating?

The bar is making me CRANKY!

*Edited for typography and clarity.

**P.S. And ALSO, the stupid page that supposedly has relocation information? Yeah, it doesn't have any information about a gas (utility) company. And with a name like "Citizen's Coke and Gas," I would like to have an official link, please. I mean, I love coke and gas as much as the next person, but I am trying to pass the bar here.


Anonymous said...

Relocation is the Fourth link down under "About Indy". Is that what you are talking about?

sweet jane said...

Um.... yes? no?

Yes, initially I wanted relocation information. Eventually, I found it. But the *getting there* is what I was talking about. That, and the underservingly superior tone of the Asshole Webmaster's email.

A recap:
I went to the city's page, I didn't see anything helpful there, so I left a suggestion for the webmaster that it would be helpful to have that sort of information. Had I clicked on the "prominent" link (on the city's page) that would have taken me to the Indy Convention & Visitors Association page(, I may have eventually seen the "Relocation" link, which is the 4th link down under "About Indy." However, I never clicked on that link, because the city page's description of it/the Indy Convention & Visitors Association page was totally not what I was looking for. So I didn't think it would be helpful. So I didn't waste the time checking.

Except now look at all the time I've spent.