Meee-ow!

I got a nice e-mail today from Caroline, the woman in Career Services who really kept me going through my long, frustrating job search. In the e-mail, Caroline e-introduced a woman I'll call "Beth" and explained that Beth had recently sat for the Bar and was looking for a position in my city, blah blah blah, she hoped I'd be willing to share some thoughts with her. Then a couple messages later in my inbox, there was a very nice e-mail from "Beth," asking if I might be willing to chat with her about job searching. Lovely!

Unfortunately, "Beth" is a bitch. Clearly, she doesn't remember my name, and I doubt she'd even recognize me, but oh I remember her.

She is (or at least was) the girlfriend of an acquaintance's roommate, and shortly after I first met her, I had a very negative interaction with her in a class that we shared. Honestly, I don't even remember exactly what happened--I think I came in on the second day of class and accidentally sat in "her" seat, which happens, all the time, and it's effing irritating, everyone knew that your first day seat was yours and that you don't take other people's first day seats. But I remember she was such a bitch about it that I got shitty back with her (which, if you know me outside of this blog, really rarely ever happens, especially with near-strangers) and then called her the C-word later in retelling the incident. And then gave her serious stinkeye (which was definitely returned) the rest of the year.

It was just one of the things that you reflect on later and think, "Who ACTS that way?!?"

So anyway, I have no interest in helping her do anything other than walk in front of a speeding train. But I don't know how to professionally say that to Caroline, or even if I should. Maybe I should just grow up, get over it, and pretend that nothing ever happened and I have no idea who "Beth" is. I mean, it was over seats for class. Big deal.

But she just acted like such an entitled, evil bitch that I really don't want to help her, and I can't believe that I should.

At the same time, I don't want to just ignore the e-mails. I remember too clearly how hard it is to undertake a job search, especially when you feel like everyone else already has a job, and as much as I dislike "Beth," I have no desire to actually make her search more difficult. I don't want to be mean. I just don't want to help.

So finally, after a little deliberation, I sent the following e-mail back to Caroline (minus a few more personal opening sentences):

It’s so lovely to begin to be on the receiving end of these “any ideas??” e-mails (I just got a cold resume and letter from a total stranger at Tulsa!), but this particular one brings me a little dilemma, and I’m not sure how to handle it professionally. Seeing as you’ve always been my go-to question lady, I thought I’d just ask. Being that I attended IU Law classes at the same time as Beth, and being that IU Law is a small school, it’s not unsurprising that we had a couple classes together. I’m sure she doesn’t remember my name, as we were only introduced once, and I doubt she would remember my face, but the opposite is not true. Without turning into an 8th grader, let’s just say I had some negative interactions with her. I don’t want to be petty and unprofessional, but frankly, I have little interest in sharing my bucketfuls of wisdom (ha!) with her. I’m wondering whether a) that’s fine, and that’s why everyone warns you in law school to be good to your peers; or b) I should take the high ground or some other such cliché and agree to talk with her.

Any advice you have would be much appreciated. I hope that this doesn’t cut me off of the networking pipeline, because I really am eager to help in almost every case! I’m just not sure what to do in this particular situation.

So now I'm curious--what do you all think? How would you have reacted? What would you have done?

Word to the Wise

Don't ever, ever, ever get life insurance--or any other kind of insurance--through Western & Southern Life. They're complete idiots.

Apparently once you assign your policy to someone else, you are not allowed to get information related to your prior ownership of that policy. That makes absolutely no sense.

Yes, that's my practice area...

So here I am at work, reading a case for a petition... In a footnote (hi, Professor Bradley! I still read them!), the court in the case notes that the Medicaid Act has been called one of the "most completely impenetrable tests within human experience" and "dense reading of the most tortuous kind." State v. Hammans, 870 N.E.2d 1071, 1075 (Ind. Ct. App. 2007) (quoting Johnson v. Guhl, 166 F.Supp. 2d 42, 46 (D.N.J. 2001)).

Hahaha, yes. It's true. I should pull out this quote every time someone suggests that my area of law is interesting. While that's nice to say, very encouraging, you know, it's completely inaccurate. My area of law is important, and it's challenging, but it's not particularly interesting. Exciting, maybe (to nerds like me who like statutes and codes and such), because it's an ever-changing area of law, but interesting? Um. No.

I'm stupid

I started back on the Pill recently, after having been off of it for almost a year. Before, I was on Ortho Tricyclen, which I liked all right--except for the weight that I gained when I started it and lost when I stopped it. So this time, I decided to try Ortho Tricyclen Lo, hoping that maybe I wouldn't gain weight and that I'd have fewer side effects in general. Well, when I gained 6 pounds in the first week, I started to get a little nervous, and I've been feeling apprehensive about how this particular pill is going to work for me.

Then, last week, I missed a pill, and a few days later, I started my period, kinda (girls, you know what I mean). I was pissed--I kept thinking, I'm going to have this weird semi-period, then a few days off, then I'm going to be done with the pack and I'm going to start my for-real period. What a bunch of bullcrap. So I've been debating whether I should do that or whether I should just skip the sugar pills and go straight into the next pack, which never worked for me before but who knows, it's a new pill. I sat down to do a little online research about missing a pill, etc., when it suddenly hit me: I hadn't actually missed a pill. I had forgotten that, although I thought initially I had missed a pill, I discovered the next evening that I actually had taken it--I just, ahem, had had enough to drink that I didn't remember taking it. (But seriously, what a good girl, remembering to take my pill!)

Anyway, after a moment of self-congratulation, I started to freak out a little. If I hadn't missed a pill, then why was I having this weird semi-period? Is this going to happen every time? Because that is just not ok. I mean, this is more than just "breakthrough bleeding." I can't be having this and then having a for-real period, too. I started to examine my pill pack and count how many pills I had left, to try to decide whether or not to take the sugar pills...

Oh wait.

The sugar pills.

There are only 4 of them left.

Yeah.



P.S. Read yesterday's post. Then read this one. Yeah. This is one of those ridiculous things.

Holy hell, it's been a while!

Hey y'all! Didja miss me?

Hello? Hello?

[tap tap tap] Is this thing on?

Most of you reading this (all 0 of you) know that I managed to finally get a job, in the area of law that I wanted to practice in, with people I've discovered I really like, in a firm that so far has treated me well. I can't believe it, but it's true.

My personal life has been, well, typical. Usually ridiculous, always interesting; full of ups and downs, but always full.

I was reading through my old posts tonight (why? why? go to bed you big dum dum!) and laughed myself silly. Sometimes I am funny! Like, objectively funny! Can one be objective about one's own talents? Hmmm. A question for the ages.

Anyway, sometimes I forget that I'm funny--usually when my life gets a little static and I'm not meeting new people who praise me for being funny. Yeah, I'm a sucker for gratuitous affirmation. But how does one who is funny stop being funny? Is being amusing occasionally enough to have the self-identity of a funny person? And who decides that one is funny? I mean, am I only funny if someone else says that I am? If I'm the only one who thinks I'm funny, then am I really just deluded and annoying? (Well... yes.) So when I feel like I'm not funny anymore, like I haven't been amusing in a while, is that just my perception, or is it a perception that others share and that I have picked up on? And if it's my perception alone, then can it possibly be true? Or I am really just deluded and (maybe) annoying? (Oh like this self-indulgent post is not annoying, come on, self.)

My impression is that my particular funnyness comes from my willingness to exploit, for comedy's sake, the ridiculous things I do*. Because I really do do ridiculous things (hahaha I said doo doo). But, in making fun of these ridiculous things, and by extension, of myself, do I cement in everyone's mind that I am just a fool? Because I'm not. It's true, I do foolish things, I do silly things, I do ridiculous things. But I am not a fool. And sometimes I get the impression that my friends really do think I'm a fool. They are unsurprised when I do something foolish; they expect me to do something foolish. (Stop saying funny, ridiculous, and fool; jeebus.) They cease being amused by my antics and by my relation of my antics and instead are annoyed by them. They don't see me as a funny person anymore. Just a fool.

And that hurts my feelings. Do my friends even know me? Do they even want to know me, the real me? Do they notice when I do something unfoolish? Does it alter their perception of who I am? And, if they think I'm a fool, then what are they, to be friends with a fool? And what am I, for being friends with people who think I'm a fool? And why do other people from my past lives, with whom I did much more foolish shit, not consider me a fool, but instead see me as a complex, complicated, deeply funny person? And do they really think that, or do I just like to think that they do? And maybe, just maybe, should I just get over myself? I mean, really, do people think about me as much as I think they think about me? I'm guessing no.

What it all comes down to, I think, is this: am I anything if I'm not funny? And if I'm only funny because I make fun of my own ridiculous and foolish antics, am I anything if I'm not a ridiculous fool? So why should I be upset when my friends think I'm a fool? Shouldn't I feel affirmed? If I feel hurt that my friends think I'm a fool, then do I really believe that I'm funny? If I don't believe that I'm funny, then who am I? And am I not a little old to be having the "who am i?" internal debate? Aren't you supposed to have this shit figured out by the time you're 30?

Yes. These are the questions that keep me up at night.


*Like leave my ticket for the Jack Johnson concert on the kitchen table. And not realize it until I'm walking up to the venue. After sitting in traffic for an hour.

Job update & sinus talk

Ok, so by now, most of you probably know that I'm waiting to hear whether Firm A wants to give me an offer, and I don't expect to hear anything from A for at least another 2 or 3 weeks. You may also know that I got two more interviews yesterday, and I've scheduled them within the next week. If you didn't know that, well, now you do! Cross your fingers for me that something comes through.

And now on to what I really wanted to blog about: my new neti pot!

Ok, so a neti pot is this thing that you use to clean out your sinuses, basically: you fill the pot with warm, slightly salted water, you tilt your head over a sink, you put the pot's spout in one nostril, and you let the water flow in one nostril and out the other. I know it sounds weird and uncomfortable, and it kinda is, at least the first time you use it. But OMG, y'all. I can breathe. I can smell things! I can BREATHE!

I don't think I often talk about how little air I can actually take in through my nose--I often end up mouth-breathing, because I just have little tiny sinuses. Or so I thought. I am breathing through my gloriously clear nose right now! My head and face feel about 5 pounds lighter! It feels awesome. I am a convert.

If you have allergies, or sinusitis, or if you get a lot of colds, or if you often just feel stuffy.... try this. Seriously. I know it sounds weird, but it's really safe, easy to get the hang of, and EFFECTIVE.

Verizon Wireless

I think it's really interesting how, since Verizon Wireless has stopped including detailed billing that shows when I made calls, my cell phone bills have skyrocketed so that I have significant overage charges each month, even after upping my plan. My cell bills have been $100+ every month for the last 6 months.